Guarding the tongue

Proverbs 21:23 “He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.”

We’ve always tried to teach our kids the facts when it comes to our belief system. We may simplify tough concepts because of their age; we may use a softer term with the same serious meaning. But it’s always the truth. For example they understand there is a place for “the debil” (i.e. the devil), but we haven’t yet labeled that place “hell”. They realize that when an animal dies, it doesn’t go to heaven, although they can’t quite get their minds around “the soul”. And they get the general idea that when we choose to disobey God-in whatever form that takes-we are taking the risk that we may have to go live with that ole debil when we die.

We try to have an open dialogue with the boys so that when things become scary, confusing, or just plain tough, they will come to us with their difficult or burning questions. These things considered, it was really no surprise to have a heart-felt conversation with our six year old last week about his concern over his little brother’s unguarded tongue.

As Brisco was finishing up in the bathroom, I was tucking Cooper into bed when he said in all earnestness and sincerity, “Mom, Brisco is gonna go to the devil if he keeps saying all those bad words.” Oh boy. I shuddered.

To clarify, our youngest is no filthy-mouthed sailor. He doesn’t watch grown-up shows on television or listen to dirty rap songs on the radio. He can’t pick a true four-letter-word out of a sentence…yet. But we do have a few rules around here concerning what is appropriate language for a five year old and what is not. These are the “bad words” to which Cooper was referring.

Still, violation of one’s conscience is a serious predicament, and as carefree and reckless as little Brisco may seem, the boy most definitely knows right from wrong. Sometimes he just needs to listen a little closer to his Jiminy Cricket.

So, caught a little off guard as I was regarding Cooper’s concern, I assured him that he was right. Saying bad words is not OK, and it makes God sad and disappointed when we do it. But I also reminded him that we all sin and make mistakes sometimes. God will forgive us if we ask. His response? “Well, Brisco had better start begging!”

I was touched by his concern for his brother’s ultimate resting place, and reminded him that the best way he can help and encourage his brother is to do what is right and always be a good example for Brisco to follow.

For the younger boy? I decided it might be time to get busy on his conscience, so I chose a new “memory lesson” for the little one. I determined a long time ago that if gradeschoolers can memorize 20-line poems, my children can surely memorize 20-word truths. And so this week, we learned that “He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.”

“What is calamity?” my curious one asked.
“Disaster! Tragedy! Misfortune! Catastrophe!”

With all my drama wasted on the young, he said, “What does that mean?”

“It means that it is impossible to be pleasing to God and stay out of trouble if we let our mouth override our brain. In other words, think before you speak, young Skywalker.”

“So you mean don’t say stuff that will get you into trouble?”

Aha, my little Jedi. “Truly wonderful the mind of a child is.” I guess a little advice from Yoda was all he really needed!

And that’s All in a day’s work!