Facebook funnies

Seems kids all over are giving their parents a laugh. From New York to Philly to South Carolina and back home again, there’s not a parent in the world who can’t relate to the embarrassing, disgusting, hilarious or simply inspiring things our children say and do every day. And now, thanks to technology and the 21st century, we can share it all, with only the click of a button.

Following are just a few of the true-to-life, real-time, Facebook funnies my friends all over the globe have shared with me.

Sigh...don't you just love it when your child runs from you, hollering, down the middle of the isle, to the front of the auditorium, during worship! All the while, you're helplessly chasing him with a baby on your hip when he starts loudly repeating what the preacher is saying. HELP! I have a preacher's kid!

Levi: Mom, why can't 11 year olds go to Pirate movies?
Me: What do you mean? What movies?
Levi: You know, just Pirate movies...why can't 11 year olds go?
Me: I have no idea what you're talking about, Levi.
Levi: (with a big toothless grin) Because they are rated ARRRGGHHHH!

Good grief. Just walked in on Jonathan standing at the toilet, tinkler in one hand, toothbrush in the other.

Dylan, my 4 year old says, "Dad where are you going?"
I say, "To the gym to exercise."
Dylan: "Why do you need to exercise, dad?"
Me: "To stay in shape, son."
Dylan: "What shape are you getting into dad, a rectangle?"

As we were driving home from the gym this morning, Beckett told me we were "chasing the sunshine". I don't think I'll ever look at driving in the sunlight the same again.

Seriously, I have just been replaced: "Mommy, you are almost as pretty as Katie." This would be the same Katie he wanted to buy a special green M&M Valentine gift for.
Wow. He's 4 and a half.

Jackson decided to learn some math this morning...by counting how many Kleenex were in the box. Now Zachary and I are cleaning up the mess...

The kids are "skiing" from one end of the house to the other. Who wants to watch the Olympics when you can be in the Olympics?

It's a beautiful sight when your 2nd grader is curled up in a chair, totally engrossed in a book.
I'm taking the highest bid for a 12 year old boy. Any takers?

So, this week from my twins I learned that hand sanitizer does not take the place of shampoo and if you paint your face with whiteout, you really have to wait at least three days before it even begins to start wearing off. Thanks, Cohen, for that little bit of education.

Beckett has just realized that "Ban-babes" are for "boo-boos".

Sometimes when moms get tired and hungry, they aren't very nice. Such moms should really remember this when their children get tired and hungry.

Nate told me today he wants me to go to college with him. I think I will check back in 14 years. I suspect he will have changed his mind.

Me and this kid were the only ones inside the Subway when I went there this morning to get cookies for breakfast. He came and stood by me and said, "You can order first—My mama says to always let ladies go first—It's my birthday—I turned 11 today—That's why I'm late for school."
Me: You've got a good mama and Happy Birthday—are you ordering anything?
Him: Nah, I'm just waiting for my bus.

Mollie is obsessed with Barney........... paybacks for years of making fun of him.

Really? Potty training my third child and I leave the house without diapers or wipes. Sorry to all the parents in the Grove Valley Elementary parking lot.

I feel like such a failure as a parent- I just realized my 7 year old doesn't know how to change a light bulb.

I ran out to start the truck this morning. I saw Biggie standing in the yard while it was pouring rain and I yelled, "Biggie (no boots on), what are doing? Get in the house baby!" He yelled, "Mom I'm tasting God’s rain in my mouth and face!"
I smiled and just let him stand there so God could enjoy him for a moment.

And that’s All in a day’s work!